Boulder

I ripped this picture out of the Ensign last January and added the ENDURE IT WELL post-it note. It hung on the back of our front door for six months. The back of the front door is the A-1 prime real estate spot in our house. You can't go anywhere without passing it. I glanced at it no less than thirty kajillion times the last five months of my pregnancy. I let it sit undisturbed under a magnet for half a year because I wanted to remember two things:

1. I asked to be pregnant.

2. I got what I wanted.

Too bad if it was hard; I needed to endure it well.

My parents came out for a few weeks in July to help with the baby. After they drove back to Missouri I noticed my dad had written (USE YOUR KNEES) under ENDURE IT WELL. My clever dad with his horrid knees. I have the same genetically horrid knees.

I recently had my body Biolevered (a machine that measures the distance between your joints and points and mathematically reveals the safest way for you to work out) and guess what? I have a 7" squat depth. That is such a small squat. All these years of diligently wearing spandex and white headphones twice a week in the weight room for what? For oversquatting and therefore punishing my poor knees instead of making them stronger. I was diligently breaking myself. If only I had used the right technique my knees might be safely cushioned with ropes of muscle this very day. Sigh. Live and learn.

There is no way around it; life can be hard. We balance boulders on our bruised backs and carry crippling concerns. Yet we voted for this mortal experience and shouted for joy when we got it. So how do we ENDURE IT WELL?

I think there are two safe techniques that will not break us (and both of them are completely free):

1. DELEGATE or DELETE DEAD WEIGHT

"Thou wilt surely wear away, both thou, and this people that is with thee: for this thing is too heavy for thee; thou art not able to perform it thyself alone." -Exodus 18:18

This Bible verse is taken from the counsel Jethro gave his super busy and physically weary son-in-law Moses. It would seem Moses never left the office because there was an eternal line of needy people who could ONLY speak to him. Even Moses couldn't do everything and was warned the pattern he was in would lead to ruin for both himself and those depending on him. Jethro advised him to delegate, to teach the law to others and appoint them as judges. More judges = shorter lines for Moses = more time for family. I'm inferring a little but the Bible is clear Moses delegated to prevent self-destruction.

When I feel I'm being crushed I have to step back and honestly assess the stress. First off, are the things I'm worried about even important or am I arranging chairs on the deck of the Titanic?* Am I feeling overwhelmed because I am doing things other people can/should be doing? If so, train the other people or let it not be done. Are my expectations reasonable? Homemade baby food: YES. Giving up sugar and gaining a six-pack while maintaining current scrapbooks and sending organized digital desktops to the protection of a cloud: NO. Since Archer was born I've struggled with this. I have had to really shrink my to-do lists. A list that reads

• FEED BABY x6
• PICK UP DAUGHTER FROM SCHOOL
• MAKE DINNER
• BE STABLE FOR GREG

just doesn't have the panache my old lists used to have. I'm running to stand still and simply can't carry the weight I used to. Bye-bye bragging rights, hello reality. I have to be okay with today and today I can only do the essentials.

2. USE YOUR KNEES

My dad was right. Get down on whatever type of knees you have and pray to the Lord for help. (If you have one of those teardrop-shaped quads on the inside of your knee know that I'm crazy jealous.) Pray morning and night and the spaces between. The scriptures are chock full of promised blessings if prayer is tied to obedience; we can receive enough nourishment and strength to do what is asked of us, we can come off conqueror and escape the grip of Satan, we can be endowed with power and enlightenment to the point our souls are full of joy, and we can have our burdens lightened if not removed. Perfect help is words away.

*Paraphase from Elder Neal A. Maxwell. Image from THINKSTOCK. Good scriptures: 1 Nephi 17:3, D&C 10:5, D&C 11:13-14, Mosiah 24:14