Good Beyond Measure

I took my kids to the splash pad in Highland. I wasn't planning on going there; I had impulsively driven through JCW's and ordered cheese fries and Oreo shakes. They gave me A napkin. With equal impulse I drove to the splash pad sans swim diapers, towels, sunscreen, or changes of clothes. I did, after all, have one lousy napkin.

RE kept Archer under her wing while his brows furrowed at the craggy boulders and water gun gang. She surrendered her pink flip flop and like Dumbo's feather it did the trick. Instant performer, bye bye fear...as long as he was holding that flip flop. I sat with my feet in the water eating the lion's share of cheese fries trying not to cry in public. Sometimes I still can't believe he's here. Not only here but HERE chirping happy sounds and walking like Frankenstein, mooing for more milkshake with droplets on his eyelashes.

On a recent phone call my aunt mentioned how happy I sound now. NOW meaning NOW ARCHER IS HERE. I hope I was happy before but I know what she meant. I am so happy now. I'm so happy I don't even know what's in my brain. Whatever is up there is light and whimsical and obviously frolicking. For years my brain was heavy and thick, like submarine walls. The daily thought cycle

where is my baby

what can I do today to get closer to a baby

what does the Lord want me to do today

please, Lord, is it time

where is my baby

made my skull rattle like Tin Man's hollow chest. I think I had an emotional migraine from 2011-2013. That head hurt. My new head, the airhead that doesn't have to wonder anymore, hasn't hurt since I got pregnant. Until the night of the splash pad.

I cried Greg to sleep, then I re-cried myself to sleep because life is so good. If I opened a present containing a massage, a haircut, one of those hummus veggie wraps Fraiche used to make before they changed their menu, a BareMinerals shopping spree, and a chocolate fountain spurting endless 60% dark from a spring in the earth's crust it would not come close to the goodness of my life at present. Archer and RE finally have each other, laugh at one other, hold hands, wrestle, share, do their own thing, gang up on me. At long last RE's sidekick has arrived yet she will fly the coop in four short years. I guess I also cried because my kids had to be so far apart. I don't know why my plan had to be two kids 13 years apart; I have to trust the Lord on that one.

My heart is out of space so it moved one thing to my vacant head. Front and center is the new daily plea

Lord, please let the joy of now

[this good beyond measure]

to somehow be pressed down, packed in, and held together

so it can run over for years and years.

Mete magic with this little time.

Photo caption and scripture verse supreme: Luke 6:38 (KJV Bible). Also referred to as the "Cami Mecham brown sugar" scripture by many of us at church. Photo of a vintage kitchen scale I obtained at Nook & Cranny after years of searching; this is the same make and model as the scale my mom used in our home when I was young. I often watched her weigh stew meat and ground chuck on it. I still love the illustrations; I've never weighed lettuce but look at that beautiful type!